Aug. 7th, 2009

apocalypticbob: (Default)
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Easily The Breakfast Club, with Sixteen Candles coming in a close second.
apocalypticbob: (Default)
Dear Bob,

There are certain things you are no longer allowed to buy, until you use up a good majority of your stash. These include:

1) Soap/Lotion/Body Wash - Now woman, I know you've gained a lot of weight, but you still only have one body, and you can't take 20 baths/ showers a day. No more until you use up the vast stash you already have.

2) Fabric - OMG! Totes and totes and bags and bags and bolts and rolls of fabric. Start sewing and stop buying! No more until you use up at least a few totes worth. Seriously.

3) Perfume - I know, I know. You are addicted to BPAL, and the Halloweenies and the Sachs and Violens update look amazing, but you can't. You just can't. No more until you have tested at least half of the imps in your "to test" box and then, seriously, limit yourself.

4) Craft supplies - You have bought and rebought so many things that you shouldn't need to buy certain supplies ever again. Only buy what you need, and stop buying multiples.

5) Hair stuff - You have one head. You can't possibly wash, style, and futz with it enough to use all the stuff you have.

6) Blankets - Are you expecting a nuclear winter? I know you had a rough time when you were a kid, but get over it. You have more comforters than the bedding department of Sears.

7) Doc Marten shoes - The 90's are over. Grunge is dead. You aren't a lumberjack. Deal. I know they are comfy, and you can keep the ones you have, but no buying any more until these are good and worn out and gone.

8) Stuffed Animals - You are almost 31, not 12. Let the majority of them go.

9) Gifts - No more buying things to give as gifts and then losing them in your house.

10) Books - Yeah, right. Let's not get crazy here.

Well, eight is a start.

*grins*

Seriously, though. No more retail therapy. Being broke has helped you there, but don't fall back into that habit when you are working again and not broke.

Hoardingly,

Bob

**********************************************

Dear Uterus,

Die in a fire.

No love,

Bob

*********************************************

Dear Smog,

You've got to get back to a somewhat normal sleep schedule. I know VBS has kept you up late this week, but there's no reason to still be up at midnight.

Sleepily,

Mom

*******************************************

Dear Flist,

Love you. Haven't been on as much, because I've been spending a lot of time working at my place, trying to take it from a storage facility to an actual home. It's been exhausting, both physically and emotionally, but I'm making progress. I look forward to the day in the not too distant future when I can actually have people over to my home, small though it may be, and not be ashamed. I'm a bit excited about this. For a hoarder, this is a big step, and I'm a bit proud of myself, too. I'm starting to realize the light at the end of the tunnel isn't a train after all.

Hopefully,

Me

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